Wednesday, August 31, 2005

katrina & CL

i was trolling craigslist and, for the first time in a long time, checked out the rants and raves. the topic of choice right now for fucking insane people is hurricane katrina, and - heartbreakingly - the majority of posts involve arguments over comments like, "THERE IS NO KATRINA BUSH IS JUST TRYING TO DIVERT ATTENTION FROM HIS FAILURE IN IRAQ" and "KATRINA = GOD'S PUNISHMENT OF HOMOSEXUALS".

nothing. makes me madder than shit like this. nothing.

i fucking think bush is a narrow-minded idiot, but...honestly, to imagine all those people, husbands, wives, children, businesses, and *hisotry* in louisiana and mississippi, completely devastated, lives lost, families with nothing...and then to turn around and say that it's something the government made up? are you seriously writing that?? how can you assholes SAY something like that, it's so insensitive - even if it's a joke, it's heartless, there is real tragedy happening.

and, bringing back memories of crazy talk back in christmastime when the popular hate theory was that god was punishing the southeast asian nations (oh, and sweden.) for, i dont even know, for whatever, with the tsunami, we have the radical right saying this is a big God is punishing gays/decadence/deviance issue. fuck you. god did this to punish homosexuals? i don't fucking think so, and how dare you. there are people homeless, spouseless, penniless, hungry, scared, and hopeless out there, and you choose to make this a gay thing? FUCK. YOU.

*sigh* my heart goes out to all those in the gulf states. donate where you can, guys.

stop by flickr to see more of hurricane katrina photos.

Sunday, August 28, 2005

things breaking

y aquel relojand the clockface
cuyo sonidowhose cadences
la voz de nuestras vidas,our lifetimes,
el secretothe serective
de las semanasof the weeks,
que una a unaone after another,
ataba tantas horasyoking the hours
a la miel, al silencio,to the honey and quietude,
a tantos nacimientos y trabajos,the travails and births without end -
aquel reloj tambiéneven the clock
cayó y vibraronplunges downward, the delicate blues
entre los vidrios rotosof its viscera
sus delicadas vísceras azules,pulse in the splintering glass
su largo corazónand its great heart
desenrollado.springs open.

from pablo neruda's " oda a las cosas rotas (ode to things breaking)"

Saturday, August 27, 2005

non-recommendations 1 - the brothers grimm

the brothers grimm

terry gilliam, WHY?! *weeps* matt damon & heath ledger - this movie is horrible:

it's too long.
it's not interesting.
characters are annoying.
the love plotline makes no sense.
the accents (the french accents) are cringe-inducing.
moves too slowly.
it's not funny, but thinks it is.

on the upside...the women are beautiful, lena headey as the reluctant ally to the boys, and monica bellucci as the mirror queen. and, um, some of the sets are quite nice, good job props guy. that's probably it, though. avoid this one.

Tuesday, August 23, 2005

criminal law blurb.

Though law and morality are not the same,

and many things may be immoral which are not necessarily illegal,

yet the absolute divorce of law from morality would be of fatal consequence;

and such divorce would follow if the temptation to murder in this case

were to be held by law an absolute defence of it.

*sigh* so there is some hope...and poetry in this after all.

Sunday, August 21, 2005

steve & jeff explain to patrick...

Patrick: It was just so embarassing. I didn't know what to do.
Steve: Happens to us all, mate.
Jeff: All of us, in our time, are visited by the Melty Man.
Patrick: The what?
Jeff: Don't say his name, Patrick. Don't even think his name or he will rise from the shadow dimensions to do his evil work on your terrified pants.
Patrick: [chuckle] Terrified pants?
Steve: [gravely] There's nothing funny about the Melty Man, Patrick.
Patrick: [face falls] You know about the Melty Man, too?
Steve: We all know the Melty Man.

Patrick: Who is he?
Steve: The archenemy of trouser confidence.
Jeff: Professor Moriarty. In groin form.
Steve: Darth Vader.
Jeff: Without the helmet.

Patrick: [terrified and shocked] What does he do?!
Jeff: Patrick, you *know* what he does.
Patrick: [looks down] Oh... right.
Jeff: You're in bed with a woman. Everything's going fine. That's when the Melty Man strikes.

Steve: Suddenly you find yourself thinking, "Maybe she's really bored."
Jeff: Maybe you're licking her neck too much. Are you over-wetting her neck?!
Steve: Are you spending an equal amount of time on each breast? I mean, what if one breast gets ahead?
Jeff: Should you be switching between them really quickly or should you squish 'em both together and do them at once?! [demonstrates. Patrick frowns.]
Steve: Or should you skip one breast completely just to save time?
Jeff: She's wriggling about! Is that a good sign - or is she just trying to draw her neck?!
Steve: Should you kiss her now or does that mean you gotta start from the top again?
Jeff: Should you be making noises yet? Is it too soon to grunt?

Steve: [snaps fingers] And then, the killer - out of nowhere, for no reason you can think of, you call her *huskily* "baby."
Jeff: You never called her baby before.
Steve: You've never called anyone baby before.
Jeff: So why did you just call her baby? - Suddenly, you're starting to blush.
Steve: Now, you're blushing *and* you've got and erection. NO ONE'S got enough blood!
Jeff: The engines cut. They can't take it.

Steve: Then the Melty Man hits you with his secret weapon.
Jeff: Just one single thought is placed in your mind at this crucial time.
Steve: Please God! Don't let me lose my erection!
Jeff: [hand goes down] Pufff.

Patrick: [with terror and disblief] How do you guys manage to have sex?
Steve: We don't.
Jeff: I haven't had sex in years.
Steve: It's just not possible anymore.
Jeff: We are followers of the Melty Man.
Steve: And you're one of us now.

Coupling, 2x04, "the melty man cometh"

Tuesday, August 16, 2005

recommendations 3 - zb, jg, and tv

garden state

gorgeously shot film. zach braff is so talented i want to buy him dinner, let him tell me all about his life, make me laugh, and then make out for a couple of hours. in addition to being a joy to look at (oops, the movie now, not the boy), there are scenes of such quiet meaningfulness in this movie that just resonate so well with me. it's like the graduate: lite, it's got the same sense of, where do we as young people fit in to this world, and with each other? what grounds us?

jean grey

red hair. tall, gorgeous. telekinetic. mildly telepathic, but in a way that's cooler than deanna troi. attracts the good boys (scott, ugh, sooo boring) and the bad ones (hell-o logan). not as much baggage as rogue (until the phoenix/cloning stuff).

on a related note, i gotta recommend gambit, too. hot accent. wildly mysterious. badass power, nice choice with the playing cards. and supersexy relationship with rogue.

television without pity

i know it's the off season for tv, but i freaking love this site, and you should too. the genius writers at twop obsess about tv pretty much as much as i do, only then they'll take an episode, recap it, and inject enough snark to make your mouth pucker. the very first time i read an episode recap, i loved that i had mentally made a bunch of the same criticisms that they harped on. some of the writers are funnier than others, and some shows just lend themselves better to being made fun of (the oc, alias, most reality tv...24's isn't as good, for example).

side notes: the recaps are by episode, and it's much better if you've just seen the episode you're reading about. the pull-out quotes are for some reason much more hilarious than the same words are in context! and finally, it's awesome when the writer thinks the show they are recapping is good tv; they're hard on it, but they acknowledge all the elements done well, too. check it out.

Friday, August 12, 2005

al qaeda - article

Al-Qaeda Sitcom Filmed Before Live Studio Hostages

AL BHURBAN'Q, AFGHANISTAN — Filming of the second season of al-Qaeda's surprise hit situation comedy Ba'athtime For Abdul will take place before live studio hostages. "We shall not rest until the vassals of the Great Satan know what it is to live, love, and learn as a member of al-Qaeda," said a spokesman for the show, who assured fans that the laugh- and scream-tracks would not be sweetened in post-production. The videotaped statement, like the episodes of the show itself, was delivered to Al-Jazeera's Afghanistan headquarters in a plain box containing the tape and three severed heads of studio hostages.

Thursday, August 11, 2005

girl crush - article

...oh my god. they are on to me.

She's So Cool, So Smart, So Beautiful: Must Be a Girl Crush


THE woman's long black hair whipped across her pale face as she danced to punk rock at the bar. She seemed to be the life of the party. Little did she know that she was igniting a girl crush. Susan Buice was watching, and she was smitten.

Ms. Buice, 26, and the dancer (actually a clothing designer) happen to live in the same Brooklyn apartment building, so Ms. Buice, a filmmaker, was later able to soak up many other aspects of her neighbor's gritty yet feminine style: her layered gold necklaces; her fitted jackets; her dark, oversize sunglasses; and her Christian Dior perfume.

"I'm immediately nervous around her," Ms Buice said. "I stammer around her, and it's definitely because I think she's supercool."

Ms. Buice, who lives with her boyfriend, calls her attraction a girl crush, a phrase that many women in their 20's and 30's use in conversation, post on blogs and read in magazines. It refers to that fervent infatuation that one heterosexual woman develops for another woman who may seem impossibly sophisticated, gifted, beautiful or accomplished. And while a girl crush is, by its informal definition, not sexual in nature, the feelings that it triggers - excitement, nervousness, a sense of novelty - are very much like those that accompany a new romance.

This is not a new phenomenon. Women, especially young women, have always had such feelings of adoration for each other. Social scientists suspect such emotions are part of women's nature, feelings that evolution may have favored because they helped women bond with one another and work cooperatively. What's new is the current generation's willingness to express their ardor frankly.

"Historically, talking about these kinds of feelings has gone in and out of fashion," said Paula J. Caplan, a sociologist who this fall will teach a course about the psychology of sex and gender at Harvard. Women have not been this blunt in expressing their crushes for several generations, Dr. Caplan said.

The phenomenon has been little studied, but some social scientists say they are glad that it is being discussed more, because it can be a window into how women mature emotionally.

"It's a little bit like when you're in elementary school and you first fall in love with someone," said Leslie Hunt, 34, who manages an arts internship program in New York and who once had such a potent crush on woman that she became sweaty in her presence.

Still, a crush is a relatively mild form of infatuation. People have killed themselves over true love, said Helen Fisher, an anthropologist at Rutgers University who has written extensively on human love. Think of Romeo and Juliet. With a girl crush, Dr. Fisher said, "you won't kill yourself if she doesn't want to jump rope with you." For that reason, girl crushes can give women safe and valuable experience in the emotions of love.

Dr. Fisher, the author of "Why We Love: The Nature and Chemistry of Romantic Love," said girl crushes are as natural as any other kind of love. But they are romantic without being sexual. Love and lust are distinct urges, Dr. Fisher said.

This was one of the findings she and colleagues from the Albert Einstein College of Medicine and the State University at Stony Brook made when they analyzed brain scans of people 18- to 26-years-old who were experiencing new love. Love and lust, it turned out, could be mapped to several separate parts of the brain.

"The brain system for romantic love is associated with intense energy, focused energy, obsessive things - a host of characteristics that you can feel not just toward a mating sweetheart," Dr. Fisher said, adding that "there's every reason to think that girls can fall in love with other girls without feeling sexual towards them, without the intention to marry them."

Wendy Lim, 26, a student at Harvard Business School, experienced such feelings about a year ago when she met another young woman in a Boston bar. The woman was open and outgoing, and when the evening was over, Ms. Lim very much wanted to talk to her again. "I remember at the end of the night wanting her phone number," Ms. Lim said, who felt awkward about asking. "I wouldn't ask a guy for his number."

As it turned out, the woman asked Ms. Lim for her number. The two saw each other again, and Ms. Lim's crush quickly blossomed into friendship, a friendship the women now cherish.

Crushes are typically fleeting, and infatuation often turns to friendship in this way. Lisa Lerer, a journalist, and Laila Hlass, a law student, both 25 and both of New York, started their friendship several years ago with a mutual crush. "We're still in love," Ms. Lerer said, "but the wooing period is over."

Tammea Tyler, 28, assistant director of child development services at the Y.M.C.A. of Greater New York, has a crush that looks as if it soon will make the change. The object of her infatuation is a colleague, Denise Zimmer, senior executive for government operation, who is 48.

Ms. Tyler said she admires Ms. Zimmer's intellect and her inner strength. "She really knows her stuff, and there's something almost sexy about that," Ms. Tyler said. "There's just something really sexy and powerful."

Ms. Zimmer, when a reporter told her about Ms. Tyler's feelings, said: "I was very surprised. Sometimes, when you don't have a direct relationship with someone, you don't really understand how they're observing you."

And while Ms. Zimmer did not say she had a reciprocal crush, she did say that she considers Ms. Tyler talented and grounded and that "it's exciting to work with someone who has shown that kind of interest." She added, "It's a mutual respect."

Once a crush is revealed, it can change the dynamics of a relationship. "I think that I will be more sensitive and more focused on sharing things with her that I think will help her achieve some of the goals that she has," Ms. Zimmer said.

Sometimes, though, a girl crush is so strong it makes the object of affection uneasy, killing the possibility of friendship.

Jane Weeks, 44, a freelance art and creative director in Truckee, Calif., knows what it is like to be the object of another woman's crush. She has encountered a few women who have eagerly adopted her tastes in food and interior design, her favorite colors, even her hairdresser. "At first it's flattering you're inspiring them," she said. "When they parrot back parts of yourself, it's extremely uncomfortable."

Ms. Weeks, an outdoorswoman who has hiked through the Andes from Argentina to Chile, said some women are more enamored with what she represents - "some National Geographic chick" - than with who she is. "When you're on a pedestal, there's no way but down," she said. "And it's lonely up there. You can't share your weaknesses."

Pepper Schwartz, a professor of sociology at the University of Washington and the relationship expert at, said she also has been a frequent subject of girl crushes - from her students. Some have made it obvious by bringing gifts, including earrings, flowers and even poems. But Dr. Schwartz does not encourage her students to look at her with starry eyes. She would rather they look to her for guidance on developing their careers.

"You're a hero because they think you've done something unimaginably powerful," Dr. Schwartz said. "Your job is to show them that they own something equally special."

Perhaps the last time that young women were as willing as they are now to admit to their attraction to each other was in the 19th century. "Back when Louisa May Alcott was writing, women were writing these letters to each other," Dr. Caplan said. "They wrote: 'I miss you desperately. I long to hug you and talk to you all night.' " Referring to another woman as a girl crush, she said, is not dissimilar to that 19th century behavior.

But such impassioned expressions of affection were uncommon, for instance, in the 1960's and 70's, when homophobia was even more rampant than it is today, Dr. Caplan said. Women were often uncomfortable admitting to strong feelings for other women, fearing that their emotions would seem lesbian, she said. And those same women, older now, can still be shy about expressing their emotions for each other. "Women my age are more likely to say 'I adore' or 'I value' my women friends,' not girl crush," she said.

As for men, to the extent they may feel such emotions for each other, Dr. Caplan said they are less likely than women to express them. They are not reared to show their emotions. "A man talking about emotions about another man? Everybody's homophobic feelings are elicited by that, and that's because men aren't supposed to talk about feelings at all," Dr. Caplan said.

Susan Malsbury, 24, who lives in Brooklyn and is a booking agent for bands, said that because a girl crush has the potential to become an important part of one's life, she cannot help but feel a tinge of excitement whenever she meets a fascinating woman to add to her collection of crushes.

"They're better than boy crushes," Ms. Malsbury said, with more than a hint of mischief in her voice. "You don't have to break up with them after two weeks."

Wednesday, August 03, 2005

sex and drugs - article

Sex and drugs
Jul 21st 2005
From The Economist print edition

Men and women seem to perceive pain in different ways. That may mean they sometimes need different pain-relief drugs

MALES and females respond to pain differently, even as children. In most places, boys are expected to show a stiff upper lip when they get hurt, while in girls wailing is, well, girlie. In part, this difference is learnt—or, at least, reinforced by learning. But partly, it is innate. It is hard, for instance, to blame upbringing for the finding that boy and girl babies show different responses to pain six hours after birth, or that male rats are more long-suffering than females. It is also life-long. Ed Keogh of the University of Bath, in England, and his colleagues have found that women report feeling pain in more bodily areas than men, and also feel it more often over the course of their lives.

Jeffrey Mogil, director of the pain genetics laboratory at McGill University in Montreal, is one of the leading advocates of such “pink and blue” painkillers. Pick a disease at random, he says, and the chances are that females and males will handle the pain associated with it differently. That seems to be true in mice, at least. When new mouse “models” of human disease are created by genetic engineers, Dr Mogil and his colleagues are often asked to test the engineered mice for their responses to pain. They consistently find differences in the way the mutant, diseased mice and their non-mutation-carrying brethren respond to painful stimuli. But, generally, those differences are seen more strongly in one sex than the other.

A prescribing headache

The latest example of such a difference is in migraine, a condition that is three times more common in women than in men. In 2004, a group of researchers led by Michel Ferrari of Leiden University in the Netherlands reported that they had created what they believed to be the first mouse model of migraine. Since some researchers argue that migraine is associated with heightened sensitivity to pain, they sent their creation to Dr Mogil for testing. He stresses that his data are preliminary. However, he does find a lowered pain threshold in the mouse migraine model compared with healthy mice—but only in females.

Dr Mogil is now convinced that the pain response in men and women is mediated by different brain circuits—and not only because of his own observations. Obstetricians and gynaecologists have long known that certain drugs are particularly effective in women. Mothers in childbirth prefer nalbuphine to morphine, for instance. Men, however, report the opposite preference when they are in pain.

Both nalbuphine and morphine work by stimulating the brain's endogenous-opioid receptors (endogenous opioids are the molecules that opium-derived drugs mimic). But opioid receptors come in several varieties, two of the most important of which are known as mu and kappa. Morphine binds to the mu receptors, while nalbuphine stimulates the less well-studied kappa receptors. Kappa-receptor agonists, as molecules such as nalbuphine are known, appear to have little or no pain-relieving effect in men.

Two years ago, Dr Mogil identified the first gene known to be involved in modulating pain thresholds in women. Variations in this gene have no effect on men's responses to a kappa-receptor agonist called pentazocine, but they do affect the response in women. The protein produced by this gene, melanocortin-1 receptor, also affects hair and skin colour. Working in collaboration with Roger Fillingim of the University of Florida, Gainesville, Dr Mogil found that redheaded women with fair skin—who have a particular version of the receptor—have a heightened response to pentazocine.

Jon Levine and Robert Gear, of the National Institutes of Health Pain Centre at the University of California, San Francisco, also think that there are fundamental differences between the sexes when it comes to pain. They have explored the effects of nalbuphine on post-operative pain in men and women who have had their wisdom teeth removed. The results suggest that kappa-opioid agonists not only fail to alleviate pain in men, they can actually make it worse.

Dr Gear and Dr Levine believe that as well as an analgesia (ie, pain-suppression) circuit, the brain contains what they call an anti-analgesia circuit—one which, when activated, pumps pain up. They have shown that which circuit is activated depends not only on the type of receptor a drug acts on, but also the dose given. Among their dental patients, low doses of nalbuphine had a short-lasting analgesic effect in the women, but profoundly enhanced pain in the men. However, when they added a low dose of naloxone—a drug that blocks all types of opioid receptor—to the nalbuphine, the sex difference disappeared and pain relief was significantly enhanced in everyone. After refining the relative proportions of the two drugs in the mixture, they have succeeded in finding (and patenting) a combination that is effective in both sexes.

Nor is it only the mechanism of pain perception that differs between the sexes. Dr Keogh and his colleagues argue that there are significant differences in the ways men and women cope with pain, as well.

This conclusion is based on studies involving hospital patients, as well as others on volunteers who were exposed to a painful stimulus, such as an ice-water arm-bath. Using this, the researchers were able to measure the point at which people first notice pain, as well as their tolerance—the point at which they can no longer stand it. Men were able to minimise their experience of pain by concentrating on the sensory aspects—their actual physical sensations. But this strategy did not help women, who focused more on the emotional aspects. Since the emotions associated with pain, such as fear and anxiety, tend to be negative, the researchers suggest that the female approach may actually exacerbate pain rather than alleviating it.

Dr Keogh, a psychologist, sees this difference as an effect of social conditioning—and uses it to point up the dangers of under-estimating social influences in favour of those of the genes. But it is not obvious why such male and female “coping strategies” should not be underpinned by genetics, in the same way that perceptions are.

The evolutionary reason why men resist pain better than women is, however, a mystery. After all, pain is there to stop you doing bad things to yourself. Perhaps it is because males and females are exposed to different sorts of pain. Males, for instance, get into fights much more often than females do, and thus get wounded more often. On the other hand, they do not have to undergo the visceral pain of childbirth. And perhaps a willingness to tolerate less pain than men do helps to explain why women live longer than their menfolk.

Tuesday, August 02, 2005

the 3 variable humor test

the Ham

(43% dark, 52% spontaneous, 22% vulgar)

your humor style:

Your style's mostly goofy, innocent and feel-good. Perfect for parties and for the dads who chaperone them. You can actually get away with corny jokes, and I bet your sense of humor is a guilty pleasure for your friends. People of your type are often the most approachable and popular people in their circle. Your simple & silly good-naturedness is immediately recognizable, and it sets you apart in this sarcastic world.

PEOPLE LIKE YOU: Will Ferrell - Will Smith

My test tracked 3 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender:
free online datingfree online dating
You scored higher than 20% on dark
free online datingfree online dating
You scored higher than 68% on spontaneous
free online datingfree online dating
You scored higher than 22% on vulgar

Link: The 3 Variable Funny Test written by jason_bateman on OkCupid Free Online Dating

happy birthday, craig

On 8/2/05, cyndi wrote:
ps. dont forget to tell craig happy birthday today, you bastard. you forgot!

On 8/2/05, marcos wrote:
i so totally, i emailed him this morning and IM'ed him